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Monday, 23 October 2017

5 Nonsense You Should Do To Make Your Relationship And Marriage Last. Part III

Third Nonsense I Do For The Sake Of My Love


In part 1 and also part II of this series, I have revealed two composite things you need to do if you are interested in maintaining your relationship, or marriage.

But it remains 3 am still to talk about. If you have read the previous parts, by now you are likely anxious to know what the remaining so-called nonsense are, isn't it?

Here is it:


Nonsense #3


Always sincerely say 'I am sorry'



By saying I am sorry, you break the hardest of bone. You feed your lovers ego 

Yes, learn how  to quickly say the word I am sorry. You may be suprised at the result you will get if you make it your aim to apologize whenever you sense you have offended your partner.

You can almost always surve all problems in your relationship and marriage if you make it your aim to quickly say I am sorry. 

Another thing is this, do not apologize only when you are the offender, even when you are the offendee, also apologize.

Do you understand what I mean?

This is what I mean; if you offend your lover, wife/husband, quickly say "I am sorry". 
If he/she is the one that offended you, still be the one to quickly go say I am sorry.


               Caution

Like I warned you about being sincere when telling your partner how much you love which I mentioned in part one of this series, am warning again that at this point too you have to be sincere.

There are some people, if they say I am sorry, their body language tells you that really they aren't sorry though they may say it.

So the best way to say I am sorry is by seating down with your lover and sincerely let him/her hear those words.

Give a gift if possible. Really be sorry and mean it.

I have found that being genuinely sorry touches the inner person and soften the heart immediately.

By sincerely saying how sorry you are, you break the hardest bone  and crack the hardest of nuct.

 By saying I am sorry, you feed  your partner's ego which is opposite of telling him/her how wrong he/she is. If you do that, you can never win your partner's heart.

When you be the first to apologized, you feed your lovers ego and he/she will love you more


 Never ever tell your partner

 'you are wrong and I am right' instead sincerely apologize.

Let me tell you a little secret.
Saying I am sorry even when I am the one offended, is my secret weapon to winning over my friends to my side and maintaining good relationship, expecially when it is the opposite sex. I believe you understand what I mean right?

Don't be scared to befriend a person who is hurt tempered or hard if you love him/her.

Whenever he flares up, sincerly say I am sorry. Let it show in your face you are truely sorry, That will do.

Start it today. Start saying I am sorry to expecially that special person. Be hearty and sincere, then thank me latter for the result you see.





5 Nonsense You Should Do To Make Your Marriage And Relationship Last. Part II

Second Nonsense I Do For The Sake of My Love

In part I of this series, I talked about the first working nonsense you should do to ignite love and make your relationship and marriage last.

Also explained why many may view such working idea as nonsense and why it may not have worked for them and thought how to make it work.

Bellow is another working idea some may still view as I called it, nonsense.


Nonsense #2

Make it your aim to communicate, communicate, and communicate

Well I should have put this point as #1 but all the same, since you are not expected to do one and leave the other. It does not really matters the one you do first, in fact, to get the best result, do it all at once.

It is when you communicate that you will have the room to always practice the #1.

I have found regular communication as the only antidote to stop strain, and shipwreck in relationship and marriage.

The part regular communications plays in strengthening the bond of love, feelings and affection between the opposite sex cannot be overemphasized.

I am off course speaking from experience. In fact, all what am teaching are all out of experience.
God created humans and communicated with them directly. And even after man fall, God still find a way to keep himself close to man and that is why religious groups have holy books. 

It is the same in relationship and marriage. This is a secret: if you want to keep a man or woman by your side, communicate with the person many times per day (I advise calling three times per day, I usually do so) no matter how distanced he or she may be.

If you don't communicate with that special person often per day, the space for you in his/her heart will be occupied by someone else who do.

If you don't communicate with your spouse often times per day, the bond of love and closeness will be weakened and become superficial.

That is why it is more advisible that spouse not seperate too long from each other because of work or anything else.

In fact, regular communication is the root of enduring relationship.

          Practical Time

If you are in a relationship already or if you are married, call your friend or spouse at least three times daily during the days.
When you call, ask about his/her well fare and how things are going. Crack jokes a bit, call him/her the pet names you use, tell her how much you love, create anticipation of how you can't wait to be with him/her at home at the end of the day.

Try this for 7 days and see what will happen, then thank me latter.




If you want to know more about the role communication plays in relationship and how to acquire the skill if you think you don't have it, click HERE or

Continue reading Part III










How I Know That Those Who Can Sell Can Maintain A Relationship Than Those Who Cannot

To Learn To Sell Is To Learn To Communicate

In one of my series article titled 5 nonsense you must do to make your marriage and relationship last, I listed communication as the one major thing you need to do to ignite and keep the spark of love in your relationship and marriage strong.




How do I know that those who are good at selling likely are good in maintaining relationship than those who don't know how to sell?

Sales people are thought one of the most important skills of maintaining relationship, that is communication skill.

A person who can communicate well, can easy influence people, make and maintain friendship.

I know this because am a good seller and my credibility is evidence in what your are reading right now because I have just sold you, from the moment you saw the title of this article.


Finding a Man or Woman of Your Dream


There are many smart but single lonely people who are so because they cannot find the man or woman of their dream. This is because they cannot sell. They often fail to communicate what a good person they are.

Asking a woman out for a date involves selling. Convinsing a man to do a certain thing for you is also selling. Therefore, when you cannot sell, you find it hard to create a relationship and maintain it.

Poor communication skill is the root of many fight and lack of understanding between couples and friends.

Learning selling is not just Selling in a mmarket, it is mastering your limitations.

The world is filled with many lonely people and poor people, simply because they were never thought how to sell, how to communicate, how to overcome their fear of rejection and how to stand up again after being rejected.

I know of a man who was so poor in communicating that he dreaded any thought of talking to a woman.

This man was in his mid 40, he desires to marry but he was always scared of women.

When his parent finally initiated a woman to him, he still want them to go talk to the parents of the girl on his behalf.

His parents did everything for him. As expected, that marriage didn't last. This was because either both of them or one of them are poor communicator.

So my advise is, if you want to get a man or woman of your dream. 

Before you get into a relationship, go and learn how to sell, not just selling but how to be a good communicator.

This can help you to find a man or a woman that will listen when you speak and speak you will listen. 

Let me use the example of a well known author, writer and New York  best seller whom said that learning to sell helped him find a woman of his dream to drive my point home.
His name is Robert T. Kiyosaki.

"Sales Training Help Me To Met The Woman of My Dreams"

"On a side note, without my sale skills and more importantly my self confidence, I doubt if I would have meet and marry the woman of my dream. Said Robert.

When I first meet my wife Kim, I thought she was the most beautiful woman on earth.
Today I find her even more beautiful because she is beautiful on outside but even more beautiful on the inside.


When I first saw her I was speechless. I was afraid to walk up to her" said Kiyosaki.

Why will a man be scared to walk up to a woman  or a woman being afraid to tell a man how she feels? 

The answer is fear and fear of rejection is one of the things that sales people have overcome.

Click here to read how Kiyosaki used the skills he learnt in selling to overcome his fear despite 6 months rejection by Kim. Despite  his colliques making jest of him and calling him a dog and beast.
Learn how his sale skills paid him off. Today the whole world knows who the wife of Robert T. Kiyosaki is.

Read his story and learn why you may consider learning salling before entering into a relationship or how you can use it improve your marriage.















Friday, 20 October 2017

5 Nonsense You Should Do To Make Your Relationship And Marriage Last. Part 1

First Nonsense I Do For The Sake Of My Love


Trash?
Though this may seems to be"nonsense" to you but in every nonsense there happens to be a "sense".


Here I share with you five working nonsense you can do to ignite the spark of stronger bond and affection in your relationship and marriage.

The reason I  call it "nonsense" is because in every such nonsense, there happen to be a "sense".

Am sorry to let you know that you already know this prinsciples. 

And am also sorry to comfirm that till now, you are yet to make the application a regular routen that is why you complain of no result.

Nonsense #1:

Let your partner hear how much you love.

Learn to open your mouth and then look him/her in the eyes and say 'I love you so much' (plus the pet name you call her )

Let your partner hear it always.

This prinsciple, as simple, nonsense and old school as it seems, works like magic in any relationship and marriage. I know this because it's working for me and my students who have make it an aim to do it sinserely.

           PRACTICAL TIME

Try this now: Don't read farther

OK. Get up now wherever you are.

Have you got up?
Alright....

 Work to your patner and practicalize the nonsense right away while this page you are reading is left open...

He/She isn't around? 

No problem....

Pick up your cell phone and do it right now. 

Yes, Go On. Do it right away, I mean Now!!!

Even if you are having any issue with your partner, still do it right now!

You both have been keeping mallice for a while now? 

Still go ahead and do it right now!

Just DO IT NOW!

                  CAUTION, CAUTION!

Don't flatter your mate at this time.

Instead be hearty in your affirmation. Let him/her sense the sincerity of your word.

If not, you have just down more harm than good.

                 Suprise, Suprise!

That is why some who have tried this before still have not seen their marriage or relationship getting stronger and a reason why some may say it's nonsence.

                     A  CATCH.....

Your mate will not tell you but he or she knows when you are hearty and sincere and when you just flatter.

This is not a time to flatter but say it let her sense you really meant it.

Did You Know?

By being the first to always tell your mate how much you love her, he/she have no obtion than to receiprocate.

Start it today and thank me latter.


Thursday, 5 October 2017

How I Know That Having Emotional Feelings Alone Is Not Love

What Experience Have Thought Me About Feelings and Love.


When I was much younger, I do not know what having emotional feelings is and I can't even remember having such feelings.

But a time comes in the life of every young and growing person when emotional feelings becomes so strong (age 12-20 or more depending)

At this stage, i was not an exception nor can anyone claim he is. At this stage one begins to notice changes in body parts.

Still in school, I knew many of my mates who mis-judged this feelings and thought it to be love they can express to the opposite sex. Some got into trouble.

I have seen the result of misplaced feelings of emotion so I was extremely careful to think that such feelings means real love.

I have come to know through the experiences of my mates that mere feelings alone does not represent true love.

I know that feelings is intergra part of love but love involves much more than mere feelings.

I love having such feelings too but I never acted on my feelings because I knew first handedly that love is of different types.

Do you want to know them too? I will teach you In another article, " Love, an emotional flip-flop"



Monday, 5 June 2017

The Concious And The Unconcious Love Part II

Why Is The Affirmative Statement "I Cannot Stop Loving You" An Uncious Love?

Immagine asking your child to do something he feels is difficult for him to do and he reacted by strongly shaking his head and shoulder left and right in a violent motion.

But a few minutes latter he went and do what you asked him to do anyway but in a frouned face and lack of williness, inner joy and peace.

Can you say he did it willingly or he did it because he has no other obtions but what you asked him to do?

The latter is true.

That is how or what the statement 'I cannot stop loving you' is saying.

It indicates not a person who is conciously doing what he is doing or who will in future contiously with joy, happiness and peace of mind do what he should do.

It indicates a person who can stop loving you but rellutantly keep on keeping on because he has no other obtions. Now he/she is hooked, so he has to pretend he still loves you.

Such relationshios or marriages will not be enjoyable. There may always be strain, thorn and thistles in the cord.

The truth is that, many lovers, and spouse are wishing that if they had known they will not have married the person who is their mate today. Others wish that the relationship should end. But they cannot so they feel hooked
And that is where "I cannot stop loving you" statement comes in. It is now a must though the initial desire is no longer there.

My dear, you need not wait till this future time to come for you to know the person who will not stop loving you. Who, when tribulations in the flesh comes will not wish he/she didn't marry you.

That is why you must choose wisely. You must determined during the courtship period if this person is conciously showing you love or unconciously.

           A Stone Cold Fact

It is a stone cold fact that no matter how wise you choose, there is no perfect relationship and their will never be a perfect mate.

So there may always be a problem in a relationship and marriages which could even threaten to ripe appart your marriage or relationship. 

Wether you are conciously or unconciously loved by your mate, how can you prevent this from happening.

You can't prevent 'all' relationship or marrital problems from arising but the good news is that you can prevent 'all' arised problems from tearing your relationship or marriage appart.

What if I should teach you one prinsciple or a method or tool you can use to solve any problem that have and may arise in your love life, relationship and marriages?

Will you use the tool?

Did you know?

The same road or path relationship or marrital problems follows and crips in to destroy your relationship and marriages is still the same road you can take to drive it back?

This will be a topic for another book. You will find it trilling and one of a kind to read.





The Concious And The Unconcious Love

How To Identify The Concious And The Unconcious Love

Concious love is free from a hook which characterises unconcious love

Concious Love;

'I will not stop loving you'

Unconcious love;

'I cannot stop loving you'

Do you want to avoid the heartbreak that comes from failed relationships?

Do you want your marriage union to endure for as long as you and your mates lives?

Do you want to get married to a partner that will care, cherishes and never stop loving you?

That is what every one of us want. That being the case, we need to know a secret, this secret about the concious and unconcious love.

The type of love, concious or the unconcious your date have for you before you both get married determines what you could expect from your relationship.

Can you from the two sentence above determined what I meant by a concious and unconcious love?

How To know A Person Who Conciously Loves You

When a person says he/she truely loves you, that person should be fully concious i.e fully aware of your nature in relation to his.

Therefore, the statement "I will" is a concious statement that must be used which indicates that he or she is personally aware of your nature, and still loves you anyware, and do not love you simply because of a hook.

Simply put, it indicates that he/she is not struggling to love you, and that neither you nor anyone else have imposed the person to love you, it is at his/her own "will" he did.

In fact, the affirmative statement "I will not stop loving you" is a kind of prophesy to you from your mate to be and should help you peers into the future and know how he/she will treat you tomorrow when the going gets though.

To understand how true what am saying is, lets do a little practical.

Step 1. Repeat the statement "I will not stop  loving you" three times while conciously thinking about your spouse or that special person. While repeating the statement think and feel as if he/she is present.

Step 2. Now repeat the same proccess using "I cannot stop loving you" statement while also thinking about that person.

Which of the affirmation comfirm conciousness of a decision? Which one makes you feel as if you have made the right decision which you are not regreating? Which one tells you that you were (or are ) fully aware of that person's nature in relation to yours? Which one makes you feel that you are prophesying to your dear one? Finally, which one help you sense within you that you still truely love that person?

Step 3. Now get up  go tell (pick your phone now and call, if your mate isn't present) your mate any of the two affirmation you think answers the questions above.


From today on, take note if your spouse or mate to be conciously tells you or uses the  'I will not stop loving you' or 'I cannot stop loving you' affirmation when affirming his/her love for you.

If he/she at will uses the former, then congratulations. You may have found a mate who will truely love and cherish, who have conciously loves you tomorrow from today, before the tomorrow marrital tribulations comes, and yet he/she even at that time will not stop loving you.

It is not a hook but a choice which he/she has conciously made from beginning, and is prophesying it to you today through this concious prophetic affirmation "I will not stop loving you".

This comfirms to your mate that you are not hooked by a mere feelings which you "cannot" get over but that you are fully aware, concious of the love you have for him/her so that when the feelings fails, him/her being around you still will give you joy and peace.

Now why is the affirmative satement "I cannot stop loving you" an unconcious love?

Why is the affirmative statement "I cannot stop loving you" an unconcious love?



Friday, 2 June 2017

How To Be In Love: Illustrated

A Story Of What Being in Love Is

That which convinced Joy to be with a Sammy is what love is
His name is Sammy, and People refers him as urgly in face and pockect. I gues you don't need a prophet to know what that really means, right?

At the same time, there was this girl, her name is Joy. She is an epitome of beauty. So beautiful, with a desirable shape. In fact, she is considered as priceless by many men.



Unfortunatly, the young man stated to show interest in this young lady.

Imagine!

How can a beautiful girl like that ever want to have anything to do with an urgly and poor kind of guy?

You are right...

That was exactly how she thought.

But the guy really wished they could be if nothing but friends.

However, always against his wish, is the girl's fierce resistance at the thought, not even wanting to be identified with him at all.

What is wrong? She don't like him? Quite sure.

Could you believe that every effort proved abortive. Everything that was said and done to make Joy pick interest failed.

Then he gave up and that was is it.

What you may not have known is that showing 'interest in a person' is receiprocal' and the resulted receiprocasy may sometimes become involuntary.

What am trying to say by all this big grammers is this:

If you show genuine interest in some one, either of the opposite sex or same sex, even if that person at the mean time seems to have no interest on you, don't dare worry.

Interest is receprocal. He/she will one day respond to your interest shown either negatively or positively, even if you never know.

Back to the main story.

Something changed the girl's attitude toward the young man.




As she fiercely oppose this young man's interest in her, and as she wonders what give the guy the cuorage to show such interest, something was happening.

The more she wonders and dwells on "what gave him the courage, the less she realizes she have unknowingly been dwelling on the thought about the young man.


Then something she never imagined begin to happen.

She began noting some desirable qualities that this young man posses that none of those she deemed handsome or wealthy has.

Rememner, she was thinking on 'how-dare-this-guy-want-to-date-me', kind of negative and egotistic.

But Noting his personalities, made her even more curious and to peered more even more deeper. 

The more deeper, the more she notices other desirable personalities of this young man she loves. Then she hold on to it.



"the best way to truely love a person is to first love the characters, if you can't find yourself loving much of his/her characters, neither will you love him/her"

As time passes, those desirable qualities of his began to transcend her view of him. The distgust she once felt was melting off like a candle.

 Now she can't stop thinking about him. No. Not the former 'how-dare-him' kind of feelings. That have  since automatically been replaced with 'he-seems-to-be-nice' kind of consideration thought.

Little by little, she began to feel close not to the young man,  not to his look or status in life but to his qualities.

Without the young ma's knowledge, she has on her own developed feelings for him.

As she got immersed in this feelings, she realized she truely have been rejecting a person who's soul mate she is.

I do not know how long this feelings lasted witin her. But all I do know is that one of their next encounter after developing this liking was very different.

She was earger to let this young man know that she has for long time fallen in love with him?
No. Being in love with him.

She realized that this young man has been in love with her all this while too.

And despite appearance, look, and social status, the result was a three fold cord of union and they are happily married and enduring in their union till date.

Well, till date I said.
What you don't know is that their is a path love follows to crip into the human heart. It is through an automatic natural involuntary prinsciple.

Yes, through a natural prinsciple I said.

Do you know you can solve all problems in your relationship and family through this same automatic prisciple?

All you need is to become cconcious of it and voluntarily apply it, its already within you.

I will tell you about this prinsciple latter and how it works and how you can apply it to resolve all your relationship and family problems.

But if you are very curious to learn what this prinsciple is,  and how to apply in to solve your marital problems, you can as well contact me immidiatly, and I will not charge you much.






How You Can Recognize Real Love

How Do Love Songs Makes You Feel?



A well know musician sang;

"paint my love, you should paint my love. It is the picture of a thousand sunset, it's the freedom of a thousand doves, baby you should paint my love". Michael Lean To Rock.

Hmmmm..

That is breath taking isn't it?

Off course, this is just one among the thousands if not millions of love songs that just thinking about the lyrics could get you thinking, and your emotion runing wide even by a person who naturally is unloving, isn't it?

I do not believe that one word, phrase or clause is enough to defne real love.

Therefore, I rather use some illustrations to help you learn what it means to be in love.

Friday, 28 April 2017

Fallen In Love or Being In Love?

How Is Love In Love Song And Movies?

The point is, in love song and movies, love is often portrays as always going with sexual pleasures as if without it there is no love.


Whatever makes you fall in love is an obstacle  or a stumbling block. Once the obatacle faild, then one who has fallen must get up and move ahead, that is not real love.
When such sexual pleasures is not realized, the person who failed in love simply gets up from the fallen state and move ahead, so it is to all those who thinks that love is as it is in love song and movies.

Why Some Experience Heart Break and Failed Relationships


Sourse: webneel. For a relationship to last, its requires not just fallen but being in love with each other
My dear, do you see why movies and songs often ends up in heart break and some times leave the viewer unhappy?

The point is, the character whom you watched failed in love and since the love portrays in love song and movies is just that of eros  without the love of storge or Agape, (more on it latter) it's easy and simple to just get up as it were, and abandon the victim with nothing than a broken and crushed heart on the ground state.

Such is the result that comes from fallen in the crucible love.

NEXT: How about falling in love in real life? I prefer you be in love.
What is being in love? How can you be in love?
Learn how being in love can help you avoid failed relationship, marriage. and heart break.

Monday, 24 April 2017

Falling In Love or Being In Love?

Sourse: webneel
Today, movies and songs make it difficult for people to differenciate being in love and falling in love

What Is The Defference Between Falling In Love and Being In Love?

Boys, girls male and females, all have one thing in common when it comes to the aspect of life called LOVE.

All do either  fall or be in love at one time or another. So are you in love perhaps as someone like me is, or have you fallen in the Crucible of love? The two are different.

In song and movies, falling and rising is very common. But in real life you are expected to fall and remain, that is what I called being in love.

Fallig In Love, Why It Meaning Is Different Today



Have you ever seen anyone who intentionally falls? No. Except by mistake.
Love song and movies have changed the meaning of what the world before known as "falling in love". 
Much often today, you will hear the word 'fall in love' in song and movies or books. 

I want you to know that it actually examplifies mistake in love or most at times infatuation.

My dear i know you are getting the sense in what am saying right?

This is what I mean;

Sourse: webneel. A fall is by an accident or a mistake.



Just as a person might fall maye by mistake, perhaps by stumbling against an obstacle, Will he remain on the ground?  No. If he must move ahead in life he must get up.

So it is to all who fall in love as it were, in immitation of love in love song and movies.

Next: How is love viewed in love songs and movies, that makes falling in love changed meaning today, and what is being in love? How can you be in love?

Understanding the answers to the above questions is the key to avoiding heartbreaks in any relationship.

Friday, 14 April 2017

Contacts and Inquaries

Book Title: Crucible of Love
Author: Ihegbu Samuel (Author Sam)
Format: PDF ( Yet to be published)
Contacts
Email: ihegbujahbu@gmail.com
Phone: 08161881187

Address: deplomat area, adjacent city view plaza, first bank Sokoto.

For inquaries, email or call me. Am available 24/7.

And if you desire to be the first to get this book once published, please email me at:
ihegbusamuel1914@gmail.com

Saturday, 18 March 2017

The Best Fitting Defination Of True Love




Think you know what love is?

OK...

This is a text for you.

Define love without looking the dictionary. 

"Hey...
Am waiting to hear what's in your heart not your head"-ANGELLA



"Hi....
I too want to hear what's in your heart for me not your cramed words"-MIKE

The Best Describtion of Love That I'Ve Ever Known


"Set me as a seal upon thy heart, and as a seal upon thine arm. For love is strong as dealth: Jealousy(Exclusive devotion) is strong as Sheol (grave) The flashes thereof are flashes of fire, A very flame of Jehovah.
Many waters cannot quench love neither can flood drawn it". Bible